According to research by Harvard professor Amy Cuddy, we all judge a newly-known person on the basis of two criteria. Yes, we reduce the complexity of a person basically to two questions, when it comes to building the first impression of someone.
It is an automatic mechanism that nobody can escape, which dates back to the times of the caveman, when the right first impression could really make the difference.
People respond within themselves to these two questions when they meet someone for the first time:
Can I trust this person?
Can I respect this person?
In other words, we evaluate the trust and competence of those we know for the first time. At the same time, trust and competence is exactly what we want to express, when we want to make a good impression with someone who matters to us.
According to the studies of the teacher today it gives much more importance to confidence, as opposed to what happened in earlier times. Today, the important thing is to appear prepared, talented and competent in something to earn the good first impression.
In the past, however, at the time of the caveman man, trust was the most important element; "from the evolutionary point of view, it is much more useful to know if we can trust a person who is not competent." To give an example, it was more important to know if the person in front of us would have robbed us of all their possessions, rather than if he knew how to turn on a good fire or not.
Even today, adds Dr. Cuddy, we should go back to giving priority to trust: without it there can not be relationships and ties, even those where competence is an important aspect.
"If someone we have to win the good first impression does not trust, we will not go so far", concludes prof.
Probably, today is just like that; much more work is done on refining skills than on human relationships. Do not you find?